white mom: quit roughhousing!
white son: fuck u mom
white mom: oh heavens! thomas are you going to let your son talk to his mother like that?
white dad: go to your room billy right this minute!
white son: fuck u both *goes to room and jacks off and smokes weed out of mountain dew can*
when i was a kid, i asked my dad where babies came from and he said something like “ur mom had a stomach ache and she went to the bathroom n then came out with you” and i feel like thats his way of calling me a piece of shit
Today I’m wearing a leather jacket and a daisy skirt and someone just said to me “I don’t know if youre going to give me a flower or beat me up” and like thats it. I have achieved it. My ultimate aesthetic; cute but could still beat the shit out of you